Saturday, June 21, 2008
{ Saturday, June 21, 2008 }
i've been meaning to l0ok up on the workings of life. of how unfair life is. of how complicated things seem in a second though happiness comes just a second ago. I've been meaning to take a whole day off from the world and have it just to myself; think about a lot of things that have been bothering my mind all these while. I've been meaning to share things with her, but only after she's underst0od it all a little better than before. it's not as simple as it seems. why do i keep pretending I'm fine when inside, there are loads of problems i keep to myself? cause i simply don't want to trouble others. and not just that. but also cause i know where i stand. plus, what is life without the complication of things aye? so i have to go through this myself. not on my own, my girl doesn't allow that. but as complicated as it seems, somehow she's just t0o much of a pampered girl. she has to change to0, for i want her to very much be the last girl i date and be in love with. don't misunderstand my statement though. just know that sometimes, people lie to protect their loved ones from getting hurt. and i hope she knows that t0o.
if she loves me and if she's reading this, i hope that she knows that no matter what happens, i don't want to lose her as much as she doesn't to lose me. but i've made myself clear the other night, haven't i? oh well, to have prayers answered that things will change as days go by is some sort a miracle to come true.
there are t0o much in this mind and i hope that after the NDP period is over, i can have a day off to myself and ease the tension inside me. i want to be at peace, with nothing to think about except how lovely a day can be and who i can share the beautiful day with. but not now. i suppose i have to stand back and take things as it comes at me.
to dear; i hope you really understand. i simply needed to have the morning to myself. i wasn't in the m0od and i suppose sometimes you do feel that way t0o don't you? so try to understand, especially about my super busy schedule nowadays. NDP period is here and everything is going berserk.. i love you and i've always do. you do know that right?
Labels: as complicated as it seems, i want things to change.
